New rules for the road? |

New rules for the road?

I was reading your road rage article published April 9 and thought I would submit the new rules of the road I have observed people following to a T over the past couple of years. I have been driving for 25-plus years, and, boy, have the rules changed:

1. The double-yellow line is just there so you have an idea the road is a two-way road. You can pass at any time especially on a blind curve.

2. Speed limit signs are just a suggested speed. You should drive as fast as you want.

3. Use the shoulder or suicide lane to pass so you are first at the red light.

4. The red octagonal signs with white letters no longer say “Stop.” They merely suggest that you see if anyone is at the intersection then speed through. Why stop? You may lose a few minutes and get where you are going late.

5. If you do have to stop at a red sign, remember the first person the hit the gas pedal goes first.

6. Tailgating is OK. The closer you are the better.

7. You should only make a left hand turn if you want to get hit from behind as drivers no longer have to pay attention to the cars in front of them … or is it the invisible paint being used on cars today?

8. Always leave your house or work late so you can make sure to follow all of the above rules. You should always be in a hurry.

9. Never use the mirrors attached to your car to make lane changes. The mirrors are only there for you to check/fix your hair or makeup.

10. Always go straight from a turn-only lane. Do not signal to let others know what you are doing. Surprises are the best!

These rules are followed by young and old alike.

Margaret Fink

Rough and Ready

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