Machen MacDonald: Be willing to increase your confidence | TheUnion.com

Machen MacDonald: Be willing to increase your confidence

Machen MacDonald
Columnist

People that succeed know they must be willing to go into that dark cave they fear the most. As Joseph Campbell tells us, the gold we seek is in that cave. Playing it safe is a very dangerous place to hang out if we are looking to accomplish greatness.

The thought of venturing into that cave can bring up all kinds of fear. There is no doubt that fear feels real in the moment, even though it originates from only a thought about what could happen.

However, the thought can change our whole biochemistry. That's real. Yet, in most cases, fear is highly overrated.

Fear will come up when we stretch ourself; when we do something we have not done yet and perceive there to be a risk if it doesn't go well. The way to get through it is to feel the fear and do what must be done anyway. People find having done it and not imploding or being annihilated, their capacity to actually do it again increases. It increases with a diminished sense of fear the more it is done.

Get to know your fears

This week I invite you to identify what you know you need to do and that scares you the most. It may be making prospecting calls for your business. It could be having that critical conversation with a colleague or client. It might look like doubling down on yourself without looking back or second guessing. It might even be leaving behind the familiarity of a toxic relationship.

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On an even bigger scale, it may be stepping into what you know you were put here on this planet to do and playing a bigger game. Whatever it is for you, identify it. Claim it. Step into it.

If you need to over think it, there is a healthy way and an imprudent way to do so.

Here's the healthy way: Whatever it is that you fear the most, imagine the 20 worst things that could happen as a result of you going for it. Chances are you will only be able to come up with five or six.

With the ones that you come up with, develop a plan to prevent those from coming about. For those you have yet to come up with preventative measures, simply ask yourself if you can handle and repair any damages that may result. By going through this process, many people realize the monster is not all that big and actually quite manageable.

Let's face it … what we really want for ourself is on the other side of what we fear; what scares us the most. We have a choice. We always do.

We can feel the fear and settle for living without what we really want by not going for it and allowing the fear to transition into regret and even despair. Or we can feel the fear and do what we know we need to do to get what we want. The majority of the time it will work out and we get to the other side and we transition the fear to a sense of confidence and empowerment.

We are going to feel the fear regardless. Is there any real reason we would not want to transform our fear to an increased sense of confidence and empowerment? All we have to do is be willing to go into that dark cave.

Make it up, make it fun, and get it done!

#1 bestselling author Machen P. MacDonald, CPCC, CCSC is a certified life and business coach with ProBrilliance Leadership Institute in Grass Valley. He helps business people gain more confidence and clarity to live their ideal life. He can be reached at coach@probrilliance.com and 530-273-8000.