Savannah Hanson: Unbroken
I read a book by the name “Unbroken,” a true story of a man who had a difficult childhood but became an Olympic runner, was shot down by the Japanese in the war, floated in a raft for a record time, something like 40 days without any food/ water. He was then captured and beaten, tortured, starved, then liberated. He became an alcoholic but ultimately accessed his own strength and had a meaningful and rich life.
So my miracle buddy and I were talking about just that today. So many things seemed about to break us, more than we could handle, past our breaking point, not sure we could take it. Yet somehow we did get through it and remained unbroken. Yet along the way we accumulated so many erroneous beliefs, limitations, conditioning and programs that have enslaved us. Since this little game has been going on for 10,000 years, is it any wonder that it has taken a moment or two to get past it? Yet I have been known to berate, judge and blame myself for my own lack of freedom. I stubbornly, it seemed, refused to claim my own absolute innocence.
Yet the way I hold it now is all along I was developing a holding environment, creating neural regulation until last month I was able to finally face and alchemize how broken I have felt by the evidence my five senses had repeatedly offered to me that I was a victim of my particular nervous system.
Since I had so much evidence of feeling unsafe, of a history of trauma, the identification stuck like glue. I know so many who have a litany of trauma, of incredible stories of loss. Yet we too remain unbroken.
This is what these times are calling for, darlings. To rise up to alchemize and ultimately move beyond our stories of victimization, of duality, of programming. To be at peace and acceptance of all the ways it might still feel like too much, that we are clueless about how to proceed.
What shifted for me in the last month, what has been a key turning point, was an irrevocable unwillingness to abandon myself no matter what comes down the pike. This changes everything. Once we know we have our own backs and will not abandon those inner lost ones no matter what, the game changes.
My friend recommended I drop the word trauma (at this point this could work for me, would not have earlier) and the identification with that old story. Sure it was true for eons, for decades in this life but hey, it has been a few weeks, let’s get on with the new. Other words that can lead to identification may be anxiety, depression, overwhelm.
Can we allow whatever sensations arise in the body without identifying with them? Not always so easy yet there is huge freedom here. At the same time, can we hold our innocence no matter what, even if we feel totally identified with trauma, overwhelm, fear, loss — even despair?
A vaster inner spaciousness has/is unfolding for me. The feelings of lack of safety are dropping away. There are longer and longer stretches of this incredible peace. I laugh and smile more and can imagine enjoying life and feeling safety during what begins to feel like the horror movies my daughter adores. I couldn’t even watch the movies, but OK, sure, I’ll live through however this plays out and remain unbroken. Wanna come play in that playground with me?
The important thing is to hold compassion for self and others no matter whether events, politics seem to go the way we prefer. Can we step out of duality and into humanity, care for each of our beings regardless of opinions? Are we willing to look within to create the world we desire rather than expecting politicians to solve the world’s problems? As within so without. If we want to see a new Earth, we must be a new being, one committed to peace, to harmony, to cooperation regardless of external circumstances. This is the way to create a world that works for everyone.
For information on private sessions or classes or to schedule a free 20-minute consultation, contact Savannah Hanson, M.A., MFT #40422 at 530-575-5052 or RisingasLove@gmail.com
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