Suzie Daggett: Adapting to allow appreciation | TheUnion.com

Suzie Daggett: Adapting to allow appreciation

Suzie Daggett
Columnist

Has this ever happened to you? In a blink, my calm peaceful existence turned towards dark confusion. I happily engaged in a new project, my heart open to a cooperative adventure and then, a grumpy mean mind came to live and breathe inside me.

What caused the change? Were the stars out of alignment? Did some event trigger a reaction that sent me down that pathetic spiral? How and when can I move back to peace?

Here's the story… I was participating in a collaborative project. It started out fine until a mighty large trigger was released and suddenly, I went into a dense ego driven world. It was hard to concentrate on the monumental task at hand while this dark uncomfortable fog took hold.

My spirit quieted in the overwhelming volume of my ego and went into sleep mode. My righteous ego raised its loud unhappy voice screaming, do it your way, not theirs! I followed that mighty voice and rose to the occasion, getting my hackles up and my frown on.

I wanted to move at my pace not anyone else's, even if that was not the best course of action. I wanted to be the controller, the organizer, the one who knew how to do this project right. I sent daggers around the room enjoying my false sense of self-importance with my high and mighty mind set. After a half hour of this ridiculous behavior, I realized I needed to cooperate for this task to come to fruition.

This situation can happen to anyone at anytime, especially when they are invested in being right or doing things their way. The trick is to consciously change the false ego (being right, no matter what) to a more gracious, generous and kind spirit.

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Once I was aware of why I fell into the deep self-absorbed ego chasm, I changed my pattern and snapped back to a healthy soulful person. Letting someone else be in charge is not the end of the world. It was time to come off my inflexible ego driven path and adapt, allow and appreciate.

Adapt — I consciously changed to an adaptable happier me. I followed the lead of the organized one and became helpful in ways other than my original plans.

Their system was far better mine. My ability to recognize the need to adapt made a world of difference.

Allow — I softened my edges and allowed their better way to come to pass, making my heart lighter, the load lighter and the task more manageable.

By recognizing that my ego needed to relax, my spirit was revived and the process proceeded with speed, clarity and ease. My sanity was restored with an attitude adjustment and a smile.

Appreciate — When two or more people work together to solve a problem or enhance a situation, there is bound to be give and take.

Once I backed off from my way or no way thinking, I deeply appreciated how the process evolved and how we could work together with ease. We created a viable system to finalize the project.

I am highly appreciative of our individual and cooperative skills. Life is once again peaceful and calm.

Suzie Daggett will be reading from her book, "The Pink Door ~ Mom's Journey to the Other Side" from 5:30-6:30 p.m. Wednesday, May 23, at The Book Seller, 107 Mill St. in Grass Valley. A discussion and Q&A will follow. Together we can love the one who is passing, remove the fear of death and embrace the realities of death and dying.

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